Birth - All Points Bulletin

Birth


Its hard being a name. Harder still is having a known face to go with it, especially when all you really want to do is make cool art and watch interesting things happen.

Back in the day, Birth started life as a graphics geek, cut his teeth designing flyers for a bunch of San Paros club spots. Wasnt long before hed started making a name for himself, though. His style was undeniably G-King but that wasnt really his intention; he just liked color was all. San Paro was as gray and lifeless as a corpse. And he had the power to breathe new life into it. Give it a new lease. A new beginning. His tag, then, consisted of five simple letters: Birth. Do over. A brand new day. Nothing too inflammatory about that. Right?

Wrong  at least, according to a half dozen shit-kicking Praetorians.

He never did find out exactly why they came to his studio. Mistaken identity maybe. A hoax tip-off. In any case, they didnt much like the look of his stuff. Said it was G-King propaganda. To punctuate the point, they totalled the place, wrecked most of his gear, trashed both his computers and the $2000 printer that hed worked so hard for. Everything he valued: gone in sixty seconds.

They never gave him the chance to cooperate either. He was too busy being throttled by some lunatic wearing an old-fashioned fedora and flicking cigarette ash all over his floor. When the asshole said sit, Birth did exactly that. No choice. Hell, the dudes knuckles were wrapped up in bloody bandages  hardly the sign of your play-it-by-the-book enforcer.

They found nothing incriminating  no guns, no drugs. Thankfully, they didnt think to plant something. What they did do, however, was invent some trumped up charge about how hed failed to co-operate with their investigation  the damage they had done, was on him, they said. And then, with little more than a fuck you and enjoy the rest of your day, they exited by the same door theyd kicked to pieces and left him to wallow in the shit theyd left behind them.

Awesome, Birth thought.

Were these really the enforcers Derren had promised to look out for the public interest? It was as hilarious as it was depressing. Hell, it would have been better if the so-called criminal element had kicked his door down  at least they would have left all of the good stuff intact, taken it away, sold it on; there was a chance he could have gotten it back. But now, thanks to Justin Tengs squadron of assholes, everything Birth had managed to build for himself was gone.

Its amazing how injustice can spur on a creative mind. Two years later, and Births humble designs had blossomed into a huge brand. The label was now the adopted label of the criminal fraternity. His studios had been turned over twice since that first bust, but the reinforced printer cases and bullet proof flat-screen monitors kept him in business.

Nowadays hes twice the enemy the CSA thought him to be. Hes rich. And hes legit.

He chats regularly with Arlon Benjamin  visits with his daughter once in a while, too. The old man sees him as a worthy suitor. Maybe, Birth thinks.

Every now and then he breaks bread with his two favorite badasses, Javez and Zombie. Good to have powerful allies when youre going to war. Their relationship is one of mutual benefit: he feeds money into their project, outfits their crews, introduces influential, sometimes shady folk, to the likes of Grayson Fell; in return, they protect him and grant him the means by which to protect himself.

In many ways hes become the antithesis to the Justin Tengs of this world. Like them, he knows that his pen is mightier than any sword  only these days, he chooses to brandish both. Hes made a G-King exclusive of himself, but refuses to let his label do likewise. Zombie doesnt force the issue too much.

Gresty is home, Birth always says, but the streets belong to everyone, even if they have to be called criminal to prove it. So let that bold, five letter word be a badge for all of them. Birth. Do over. A brand new day.

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  •   Level Item Category Cost Rating
    Item Icon 2 Field Supplier - Wide Radius Modifications $60,000 195
    Item Icon 3 Spotter Modifications $60,000 195
    Item Icon 4 Macchina Calabria 527 Vehicles $50,000 40
    Item Icon 5 +1 Outfits Capacity $999,999,999 0
    Item Icon 6 +2 Clothing Inventory Space Capacity $400,000 0
    Item Icon 7 Car Surfer Modifications $60,000 195
    Item Icon 8 Macchina Cosenza FTV4 Vehicles $50,000 85
    Item Icon 9 +1 Themes Inventory Space Capacity $200,000 0
    Item Icon 10 Half-Brick Weapons $0 0
    Item Icon 10 Eight-Ball Weapons $0 0
    Item Icon 11 +1 Songs Inventory Space Capacity $200,000 0
    Item Icon 12 Han Veo 420LX Vehicles $50,000 85
    Item Icon 13 Flak Jacket Modifications $60,000 195
    Item Icon 14 OSCAR NFCP 2 Weapons $18,900 30
    Item Icon 15 Fragile Modifications $60,000 195
    Item Icon 16 +1 Vehicles Inventory Space Capacity $200,000 0
    Item Icon 17 Charge Mikro Mark IV Vehicles $400,000 85
    Item Icon 18 High-Magnification Scope Modifications $60,000 195
    Item Icon 19 Patriot Vegas G23 Vehicles $400,000 85
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Nomad Vehicles $150,000 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" High-Top Boots Clothing $500 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Impact Forearmpads Clothing $500 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Impact Shinpads Clothing $500 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Impact Thighpads Clothing $500 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Hand Wrap (L) Clothing $500 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Hand Wrap (R) Clothing $500 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Cowgirl Hat Clothing $1,000 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Backpack, Skateboard Clothing $1,000 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Bikini Bottom Clothing $100 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Bikini Top Clothing $100 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" High-Top Boots Clothing $500 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Impact Forearmpads Clothing $500 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Impact Shinpads Clothing $500 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Impact Thighpads Clothing $500 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Hand Wrap (L) Clothing $500 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Hand Wrap (R) Clothing $500 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Cowboy Hat Clothing $1,000 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Backpack, Skateboard Clothing $1,000 0
    Item Icon 20 "New Gresty" Boxers Clothing $100 0
  • Subject
    Meet and Greet

    Alright bud?

    Youre the talk of the town, you know that? I cant go to a single soiree without hearing about this G thats made it pretty much to the top of the pile. Seems like only yesterday that you were running jobs for the shrieking harpy and the worlds most biased reporter. Amazing what can happen in a short space of time when you put your mind to it, huh?

    Im all about what you can do when you put your mind to it.

    Its amazing what you can do if you believe in yourself, believe in what youre doing and if you work so hard that you leave a trail of creation behind you. You keep doing what needs doing and Ill start believing all those people at the champagne dinner parties that keep telling me about how youre the Next Big Thing in San Paro.

    Dont worry though. Im not going to be like some greedy CSA assclown. Business should be a two way street! As little show of appreciation for your work so far Im sending you a new field supplier. Now, I know what youre thinking: Birth, you massive stud, Ive already been given a field supplier! and youd be right! Double B does a pretty great job setting people up with Grenades and Mods early on but this ones pretty much Field Supplier 2.0. Itll top your buddies up over a bigger range so they wont violate your personal space when they need ammo. Theyll automatically start topping their ammo up from anywhere inside a ten meter radius with you at the central point. See? Much better.

    Swing by Rimbaud sometime,

    Birth.

    Ongoing negotiations

    Wanna swap jobs?

    Ive been stuck for pretty much the entire day in a meeting that just wouldnt finish. Ive got some foreign distribution company visiting to get a feel for the real San Paro. They want to license my New Gresty line of clothing for sale in their region and they spoke English just fine the other day when we were negotiating what they were going to get out of it.

    Weirdly, as soon as it comes down to the what do I get out of the deal side of the discussion, they need an interpreter which pretty much doubles the length of every conversation youre having. All of a sudden the meeting becomes trench warfare; first person that snaps and says whatever, just let me go outside loses.

    No one said a business empire would be so dull. Im not even contributing anything to it. I just sit there in the hope that no one asks me any math questions. Ive always tried to keep myself out of the boardroom but its getting hard and harder to keep Birth the Man apart from Birth the Brand. I just want to get out there and shoot something&

    Hah. Who am I kidding? Im a lover, not a fighter. Ive got no real itch to do what youre doing out there.

    Heres a Spotter mod. Give it a try. You look at a guy, activate it and itll stick a marker on them that you and your buddies can see through walls, behind cover and at pretty much any range. Ive never used it personally but Zombie swears by it.

    Keep doin what you do.

    -B

    Sent from my SPiN v7 Phone

    My first major signing

    Hey,

    Little history lesson for you on my first big signing.

    Remember when you were just starting out in your career and you got a little Macchina Calabria 127? It had a red, white and black color scheme? That was designed by me and it was the car that got me out of my crappy one room apartment and into my own studio.

    There was a contest in Effigy, back when it was basically a Sophia fanzine, to design a paintjob on a car. Winning design would be sent off to Macchina to be turned into a production vehicle. I had this really complicated, really cool looking vehicle design. I was rolling it up ready to hand it off to the courier when I spill a goddamn orange and mango smoothie over the pages. Ive never used so many expletives in such a short space of time before or since. All of a sudden Ive gone from a pool of calm and controlled serenity to running around my apartment like a maniac. I pick up a goddamn box of crayons, a sheet of paper and a sample pot of white paint, bust them out and start working.

    I sent it away figuring it wouldnt even make it into the fuck-up pages but a week later its picked as the winner of the contest. They liked simplicity of it  I guess it fit with their chic, European design sensibilities.

    I have no idea why or how it became this huge cultural icon for Criminals in this city. Everyone, at one point or another, has one. That car made me sick amounts of cash. Sick amounts of cash that I now funnel to the G-kings. If youre wondering where that A shirt and red pants with my logo on them fits into my business empire then stop it. Theyre knock offs.

    Anyway, theyre making a new version of the Macchina Calabria 127, this time called the 527, and Ive put you on the preferred customer listing. Check the attachments on this message. Im gettin that warm, fuzzy and nostalgic feeling again.

    Keep giving CSAs lead poisoning, dude.

    -Birth

    And a good time was had by all.

    Namaste!

    Good day today. Were getting closer to getting a proper deal for international distribution of the New Gresty line so, by way of a little celebration, I thought Id send you another outfit slot. I know, I know. Im great like that.

    I see more and more people walking around looking the same. The same impact armor, the same desert scarf, the same combat pants. Its starting to become a Criminal uniform. I dont really do uniforms. As soon as we put on a uniform were as bad as the Enforcers. I hate forcers. If I thought the line between us and them was starting to get muddy, like if the Gs were starting to get corporate, Id be on the first flight out of this town.

    I think that this whole urban warfare obsession is making everyone too serious. Once upon a time Shift was one of the most imaginative hackers in the city. One time she took over all the billboards on Silver Street and started to play the original cut of Ryoko Nakaos new album. You could hear dogs howling along for miles around. Ryoko cant carry a tune in a bucket.

    Shift was this fantastic, beautiful and creative hacker. Shes pretty much lost all that now that shes tired and gray. She spends her days handing out jobs to people that remind her of how she used to be.

    Chiros pretty much the only guy in the Gs thats no different now than he was when this whole CSA thing kicked off. Hes still out there slinging some of the craziest ink youve ever seen. Hes a real artist. Hes not some goddamn pretender thats stuck in meetings all day.

    Bonitas still amazing. We met at a red carpet event that big daddy Arlon threw for me when I was just starting to get some forwards momentum. She was going out with Javez at the time and Big Daddy Arlon did not approve. He kept on telling me to ask her out and I just sat on my hands not wanting to risk the business connections Id gotten with the Green Gresty revolutionary. Maybe I should ask her out now though&

    -B

    Gresty colors, New Cross and how it fits together.

    Hey.

    Ive hooked you up with some more wardrobe space to try and make up for it so check the attachments on this message. Keep killing Enforcers. Keep showing them not to fuck with Gresty. Keep telling them that no one wants them here.

    I get frustrated sometimes, you know? Theres so much in this city to see and do and all everyone can think about is finding new ways to kill each other.

    You know when I started out I wasnt part of the G-King movement? I think of myself as a G now, sure, but not in the way that Zombie and Bonita do. I was just a kid with a spray can until a couple of years ago but Zombie and Bonita have been involved in the fight since day zero. Big Daddy Arlon helped me get my first few contracts and weve been business partners and buddies ever since. I trust the guy. I trust his vision for the city. If I wanted to go further with Bonita Id have to risk his wrath if things went sour.

    I never paid much attention to what was happening on the streets back when I was a kid; too busy with either a sketchbook or a spray-can. You cant just make art from a vacuum, though. You create art from whats around you and, when you grow up a block and a half from New Cross, whats around you are stories about Acid Jack and a lot of reasons why you shouldnt trust the SPPD. Theyll just as quick plant evidence on you as they will a boot in the back of your skull, said pretty much everyone, ever.

    When you say Gresty or New Cross to someone they think green, orange and blue: A color palette from a peyote fever dream. Theyve been the Gresty colors for decades. I used them in my tags because they were the colors I grew up around. Theyre heritage.

    So when some asshole with a stupid hat and a badge breaks down your door, throws you to the ground and puts a gun to your head all because you dared to use your heritage colors in some tags you might take exception to it. I wasnt a radical G-King before that day but I sure as fuck was afterwards.

    I think that was the exact moment I decided to go to the Marina and offer my services to Arlon. Never thought itd get this far though. Shit like thats enough to make you get angry and do something.

    Birth.

    The mod weve all been waiting for

    This is the coolest fucking thing Ive ever seen.

    I have a guy who knows a guy thats working on a commercial for the vehicles that go to the early adopters of the New Gresty line. He said that the advertising agency had come up with this thing that lets you stand on top of cars no matter what speed theyre going at.

    Long story short, I got two from the set. One for me and one for you.

    So long as the car stays level you stay on it. Works with any vehicle too which makes driving a dump truck a damn sight more entertaining. Give this a shot if you feel like going old school: Pull up next to an Enforcer, give a list of demands and then board their car like youre a goddamn pirate. Yarr!

    Enjoy.

    Saw this, thought of you.

    Sup buddy?

    Macchina are looking for somebody to show off the new Cosenza around the city and I couldnt think of a better somebody than you. Sure it might not have the same kick as what youre used to but its still a tumbly fun bundle that needs a home. Its basically a puppy with an oil leak that you can slap decals on.

    Think about that for a minute.

    Imagine what that puppy would look like.

    brb new comic idea&

    Worst sitcom ever

    This episode of Tales From The Bored-room is filmed in front of a live studio audience.

    Our hero, Birth, enters stage left to rapturous applause. He then spends seven hours in a meeting where he can feel his mind leaking out through his ears. He tries to not gnaw his thumbs off while writing help me over and over and over again on his notepad.

    Theme music plays. You write the theme song.

    Kill me now.

    -B

    Sent from my SPiN v7 Phone

    Im like Crispin Q with a hotter girlfriend.

    Couple of pretty major things are going down so buckle up, youre in for a long one.

    I got some pretty shitty news the other day. The apartment block that I grew up in has been torn down to make way for new FTW Bar. I moved my mom and dad into a nice place in the middle of Midtown years ago but it still sucks that something like this can happen, you know? I get progress is great and all but, come on, its housing thats still being used by people new to the city and theyre replacing it with a fucking E-Sports bar? Ive came up with an idea and its one of my better ones, even if I say so myself.

    Im sending you half a brick that used to be part of my old apartment. I want you to take and throw at some CSA fuck. Itll take up a grenade slot in your loadout and it doesnt explode but for the pure humiliation factor its gotta be worth having. Itll fly for miles too  the farther away from you it gets the more damage it deals.

    Zombie took pity on me after he saw my last message about the worlds dullest sitcom and how shit my life was. He decided it was time for a group of us to go out and get back to our roots. He said Id been spending too long in boardrooms and that I was starting to lose sight of where Id come from. He was right.

    Im not a fighter and he knows it.

    Rather than go out CSA hunting he thinks we should kick it like we did back in the day and just tag up some good spots in the city. He calls up Chiro and Bonita and they were both good for it. Zombie and Chiro are solid with a can, sure, but theyre nothing on me. Zombies stuck in this 1970s disco rut with his stuff and Chiro tends to tread the line between that weird goth shit that the Bloodroses enjoy so much and proper G-King art.

    Bonita was the best entertainment of the night though. Shed held a can maybe once in her life before last night. Barely knew which end was up. I managed to convince Zombie and Chiro to buddy off together while I stick around Bonita giving her, like, a one-on-one tutorial. Shes got her own style and she kind of reminds me of me when I was starting out. I mean, she reminds me of me if I were a spray-rat AND the incredibly off-limits daughter of the leader of the biggest gang this side of the Nantego. Shes got a great style - lots of long lines and big, sweeping curves.

    I managed to get in half an hour of one-on-one time with her before Arlon called her up about some party. She had to leave to put in an appearance which meant that date night was over before it really got started. I got a text message later asking me out again though :)

    -Birth

    p.s. Some CSA dick threw a poolball through the window of my car. Dangerous! Find an Enforcer and throw it back at them. Works just like the Half Brick but its a poolball.

    All hands on decks.

    Ahoy!

    I tried working on something for Bonita with a couple of DJ buddies of mine but, believe it or not, music is the one creative thing that I just suck at. Theres too many buttons, dials and switches. Ill hook you up with some more inventory space for songs. You know. Just in case you can write decent music and feel like putting some of your latent musical superpowers to use for a buddy and his new girlfriend.

    As an aside, what did you think of the ahoy at the start of this? Im thinking the New Gresty outfit should be a sailor suit or something.

    Im not sure I can pull off ahoy. Ill try mixing it up a bit with the greetings, see if I cant come up with something that fits me better. Gotta build that brand!

    -B

    Youre a one person advertising campaign.

    Howdy!

    Nah, that doesnt work either.

    Fuck it.

    The Macchina campaign went pretty well and Han are interested in getting some heat on the new Veo out there. Its a family car which in this city means theres room for a driver and three in a drive by just like the regular Veo but it has space for four modifications. Stick a Nitro in that bad boy and see why its called the Pocket Rocket.

    Ive never actually heard anyone call it that but thats what Han are trying to brand it as. Look, its a Han Veo with more customization options. You know what a Han Veo is. Its good in corners, its got a decent top speed, decent acceleration but its not going to set the world on fire. If you could drive around in it for a while thatd be great. Youre cool enough that just being seen with something like this can cause a pretty big bump in sales.

    -Birth

    p.s I ditched the sailor suit idea for New Gresty. It started to get a bit& fetish-y. Going with a cowboy hat instead.

    Arlon, Bonita and Me.

    Subject: Arlon, Bonita and Me.

    Hi,

    The first time I met Arlon Benjamin was right after some CSAs kicked down my door and wrecked the two thousand dollar printer that Id spent months saving for. I was at a pretty low point, if Im honest. For the first six months of our relationship he was helping me  he made sure I was in the right place at the right time to meet the right people. He helped me out because he saw that there was potential in me which Im glad to say Ive managed to fulfill - modesty was never my most developed trait.

    Now weve kind of switched around. Im the one pumping money into his project and making sure hes meeting the people that he needs to meet.

    Bonita wants to tell her dad that weve been seeing each other. I asked around for some advice and all I got was Javez handing me a Flak Jacket. He said itd reduce the damage Id take from grenades but its bulky as hell so I wouldnt be able to carry as many of my own grenades. Hes a weird guy.

    Eh. You can have the Flak Jacket. I get the feeling Im not going to need it. If Arlon does get pissed he wont be throwing grenades&

    Heres to new beginnings, bud.

    Were all crazy now.

    Hey,

    I need someone to confirm that its actually the rest of the world thats gone insane instead of just me.

    I managed to get some free time to head down to Chiros tattoo parlor and this guy bursts into the place waving an assault rifle around. Hes not got the safety on and hes got a really severe case of the crazy eyes going on when he charges over to the counter, slams the rifle down on it and demands that I sign his gun while he just goes into this massive stream of consciousness rant about how we went to high school together or something.

    Hes spitting, foaming at the mouth and twitching like hes about to vibrate out of the universe when some Gs come in, grab him by the arms and drag him outside. No one else in the place says a word, Chiro just shakes his head and sighs.

    Im not crazy right? That shits not normal? Its still okay for me to be freaked out by that, right?

    Please tell me that its everyone else thats is insane and Im still alright.

    On an entirely unrelated note, apparently his gun was the new Obeya Systems Carbine. Two round burst, two slots. Basically a baby OBIR. You want it? Before you ask, I didnt sign it so dont bother putting it on the marketplace.

    Sayonara,

    -Birth.

    Thank goodness for the tape shortage.

    Sup?

    Ive been spending too long in clubs and behind a desk and maybe its starting to show a little. There was a page six article on me: BIRTH PUTS ON THE POUNDS.

    Fuckers.

    Itd probably have been a page three article but one of the Prentiss girls had a wardrobe malfunction midway through a sniper battle in the shipyard and that made it a really predictable news cycle.

    Ive been given a copy of an exercise plan by my trainer. Says itll make me lighter and faster. The training program is called Fragile and its pretty high impact. You can move faster with the downside of being unable to take as much damage in a firefight. The back of the box says it gives up to fourteen percent increased speed at the loss of fourteen percent health!

    Wait.

    Thats an awfully specific number&

    You know what? You can have it.

    By the way, the big chat with Arlon went great. Hes happy about everything between me and Bonita. He seemed glad that she was finally starting to get with someone that he sees as being potentially kind of the guy he wants her to be with which. So yeah! I get to keep the girl and I get to keep my knees.

    -Birth

    Shut it down. Shut it all down.

    I got really close to making a huge mistake today.

    Wed almost closed a deal to sell international distribution right to the New Gresty line of clothing to some gigantic conglomerate. We were going to partner with what I thought was one of the coolest brands in the whole of Asia and everyone was going to be wearing Gresty colors by the end of the year but turns out they were just a little part of a bigger, shittier company.

    The clothing distributor is owned by the same conglomerate thats producing that piece of trash Prentiss Tiger anime.

    You read that right. Theres a Prentiss Tiger anime. That prick DevilDog has speedlines behind him whenever he moves. Of course, theyre the heroes in the show and everyone else is either a vampire or a mutant. Did I mention the Tigers are all vampire hunters in this? The Prentiss Tigers: defenders of the light, justice and sworn enemies of the evil vampire clan The Blood Roses. Apparently the Gs are in it next season as post-apocalyptic mutants.

    I did a SPiN search on the show (was gonna buy the studio and start requesting major re-writes to episodes. Petty, sure, but itd have been hilarious) and found out the truth about who it was being made by. I had to call the whole thing off.

    Theres a lot of bullshit in this city about taking money where you can get it but youve got to have standards. Youve got to have something that you can point at and say I will not take money from these guys because I disagree with what they do.

    Its a value judgment. Do you value money more than you value your principles? Youve got to have something that you stand up and believe in and I dont believe that you should take money from someone that spews out CSA propaganda for morons. It sounds weird but hearing about you out there, listening to the word on the street about what youre doing and how youre wiping the floor with these assholes really makes me think that we just might be able to win this one.

    So thanks.

    Ive got some really cool stuff in the pipeline right now so Ill hook you up with more vehicle storage space.

    Have a good one and put a Tiger in hospital for me.

    -B

    You, Bonita, Arlon and Me.

    Hey bud!

    I can barely get through a conversation without hearing about all the good work youve been doing recently. Youre building up a huge amount of heat so keep up the good work. Youre going to have to trust me when I say this but there are a lot of very influential, very powerful people that have started to look for you as the leading story in Effigy Exposé.

    Youve impressed Arlon in the past and youre managing to impress the hell out of me. Keep it up and youll be getting RSVPs to your own champagne parties.

    Remember how I gave you some more room for cars and was all youre getting some sweet rides soon? Ive managed to get you onto Charges preferred customer database. Theyve sent you a Mikro that you can customize. Its got three slots for modifications so you can finally tune it however you want just& try not to blow out the engine, okay?

    Bonita says hey, btw.

    See you around,

    -B

    Under a snipers scope

    Hey,

    I keep getting sent free samples of weapon modifications by companies that dont really know what Im about. Theyve read that Im kind of a big deal in San Paro and they go hey! San Paro! Thats the place with the guns, right?

    I dont get what this thing is for but maybe youll get something out of it. It sets your weapon to have a flat level of magnification and zoom regardless of what weapon you put it on. Is that good? Sounds good. Try it in different guns. I bet itll work great in everything!

    Maybe not a rocket launcher.

    Or a grenade launcher for that matter&

    Fuck it.

    Keep it out of guns with the word launcher in their names.

    Or dont.

    You found me out. I dont know about guns, okay? Try it in your next fight and well see how it works out. Ill get the medical bill if it all goes to shit on you.

    Just FYI, Bonita and I are heading out tonight so dont call. If this private jets a-rockin dont come a-knockin.

    Have fun out there.

    Shit rolls down hill

    Hey bud,

    I could use some help with a project that Im working on. Ive been asked to put my unique talents to use on a new Vegas G23 but my creative wells running dry at the moment. I cant think of anything thatd look good pulling off a line in a drag race. They sent me a dozen cars to practice on but you know how it goes sometimes. You just hit a wall which, considering the car were talking about, is pretty ironic.

    Could you whip something together? If you can itd really help me out.

    I found out the name of the CSA that kicked down my door and wrecked all my shit way back when.

    Miguel Estebano.

    You ever hear of him?

    I did a little digging into him. Hes a total jerk-off. Six precincts in five years and a brutality complaint list as long as any rap-sheet. Hes the sort of scum that got pulled out of SPPD and got picked up by Teng before he started to look at the fucking quality control. Sorry, not quality control; public relations and information control. Theyre still hiring fascists that are scared of an educated and armed population but theyre trying to make it look like theyre not. Thats what Justin Teng wants. He wants an army of middle income skull crackers to beat on anyone that disagrees with him and for everyone to just look at him adoringly.

    Estebanos stuck here in Waterfront which is something I couldnt be happier about. You seen a decent Praetorian effort in Waterfront recently? Shit, theyve only just managed to set up a supply depot here and its hilariously understaffed and underfunded. Its almost like their entire operations starting to lose momentum because theyre only in it for the money and now theyre meeting serious resistance they just cant be fucked carrying on.

    Theyre not like the Gs. Were here because we have something worth fighting for rather than seeing who can get the most zeros on their slip at the end of the month.

    Estebanos stuck in a dead end shit heap in the shittiest part of this part of town and the monster he created just put away another billion from selling exactly the sort of shit that he tried to destroy. I would put a hit on Miguel but what can I take away from him that the city already hasnt? I think I might try and drop my fucking wallet on him sometime. See if itll crush him to death.

    Sure, its not great karma to laugh at someone else and their troubles but the shitheel has it coming and with all the good that you and I are doing out there I think my karmic scales will be just fine.

    Drop by sometime,

    -Birth.

    The beginning of a beautiful friendship

    Hey,

    Amazing what can happen in such a short space of time isnt it?

    Remember when you rolled up to me for the first time all wide-eyed and ready to prove that youre the biggest badass in town? Im not one for being really sentimental about things but ever since you started working for me and being a really epic problem solver Ive gotten a steady girlfriend thats a proper mob princess and revolutionary angel, Ive got a new drive for my work and Im starting to remember what got me working in the first place. Youre a muse.

    Seeing you out there on the streets working, cracking skulls, kicking ass and taking zero prisoners has really been a huge inspiration to me and I want you to know that when this is all over and weve won you can have whatever apartment of mine you want rent free for life. Hell, if thats too damn easy sounding then I could always use a bodyguard with brass like youve got.

    Youre a soldier with the fortitude to keep it real no matter what. Someone thats determined never to compromise, even when youre eye to eye with some CSA asshole with a shotgun. I know Ill never be able to be out there fighting with you on the streets because Id probably slow you down but know that if theres ever anything I can do to help you Ill do it. If I can think of another name to give you of someone that needs a good worker that I dont think will be a waste of your time Ill send them your way.

    Ive got a present for you too if youre interested. Fuck it, even if youre not interested, youre taking it anyway because I say so.

    Remember the car in the commercial that I mentioned a while ago? It never got past editing  something about the youth of the nation being impressionable when it came to driving hundred thousand dollar vans and firing high powered assault rifles at each other.

    Ive got a huge fucking run of the New Gresty line of clothing lying around doing nothing but taking up space and Id like to send you one of the cars and one of the outfits. Only the greats are going to get their hands on this gear, bud. New Gresty. Its everything I stand for summed up in a single fucking outfit. I dont think Ive been prouder of a single piece of work in my whole life. Its the latest in what I call Concrete Cowboy-Skater Chic. Its got a skateboard backpack, cowboy hat and some impact armor thrown in for that special San Paro something.

    The cars special too because its something thats never been available to people like us before. Nulander have always been very careful about who gets their hands on these vehicles. As soon as you sit in it the thing does a background check based on your ass print or whatever and locks you out if youre deemed to be an unfit person for driving. Theyre wanting to branch out from just shipping them to Forcers though. I guess congratulations are in order as youre one of the first Criminals to own a Nulander Nomad.

    Its been styled by me, tuned by me (with a little help from The Lady O) and given to you. I owe you, pal. Youve given me so much to think about and so much to consider about what I do when I move forwards. I feel like a fucking G-King because of you. I used to be so panicked that everyone would see through me because I wasnt out there with a gun but thats not what Gresty is about.

    Grestys about more than that. Its not about the guns or the violence or the cars. Its about a community trying to come together and fight for what it believes in. So long as people like you keep doing what you do everyonell know it and no one will forget it. Were going places. I can feel it and the faster we move the stronger we get.

    Take the car for a spin. You earned it.

    Youre the next big thing in San Paro, buddy.

    Birth.

  •   Item Category Cost Rating
    Item Icon Epinephrine Injector Consumable Items $0 0
    Item Icon Med Spray Consumable Items $0 0
    Item Icon Boom Box Consumable Items $0 0
    Item Icon Resupply Box (Large) Consumable Items $0 0
    Item Icon Mobile Cover Consumable Items $0 0
    Item Icon Satchel Charge Consumable Items $0 0
  • Subject
  • Name Stages Final Stage
    NOT IN MY BACKYARD 6 Delivery
    REPO RACERS 5 TerritoryControl
    GUN RUN GANG 3 TakeOverDeathmatch
    EXEC EXPRESS 4 TerritoryControl
    DIRT ON THE DEPARTMENT 6 Delivery
    JUST WHAT THE DOCTOR ORDERED 6 Delivery
    BOX-LOCK AND .52 BARREL 6 Delivery
    PIMP MY CRIB 6 Bombing
    SEA MIST 4 TakeOverDeathmatch
    THE HOBBY HOODS 6 Deathmatch
    A TAX ATTACK 6 TakeOverDeathmatch
    CREME DE LA CRIME 10 Delivery
    MAKING A RACKET 5 TerritoryControl
    FAMILY FUN DAY 4 TakeOverDeathmatch
    STEREO TYPES 5 MovingTarget
    GOODY GUNDROPS 5 Deathmatch
    MAH-JONG MONEY 4 Delivery
    ELECTRICAL FAULT 5 TakeOverDeathmatch
    DIRTY WHITE COLLARS 5 MovingTarget
    SIDE EFFECTS MAY VARY 5 Escort
    WHAT GOES AROUND... 4 Delivery
    SEEK AND DESTROY 5 Delivery
    ANTISOCIAL NETWORKING 6 TerritoryControl
    BUTTON MASHERS 3 MovingTarget
    UP THE ARSENAL 5 TerritoryControl
    LET US SPRAY 4 TerritoryControl
    I AM NOT A CROOK 6 Deathmatch
    TASTYBURGER BANDIT 5 Deathmatch
    EYEWITNESS TESTIMONY 7 TakeOverDeathmatch
  • Level Name
    20 Paparazzi (25 Joker Tickets)

    Gettin' real mad at the paparazzi that keep stealing pictures of Bonita and I. Can you show them how it feels? <col:yellow>Spot 5 Enforcers</col> and we'll see about getting their pictures up on SPiN.

    Spot <col: Yellow>5</col> Enforcers.
    20 Keep It Clean (25 Joker Tickets)

    Hey, I can't be seen to be getting my hands dirty. Can you <col: Yellow>kill 8 Enforcers with Sniper Rifles</col> for me please? I'll just... take your word for it that it's done.

    Kill <col: Yellow>8</col>Enforcers with a Sniper Rifle.
    20 It's Cute! (0 Joker Tickets)

    I'm working on a designer pistol. Just something cute and sexy. Thing is it's gotta be practical as well as stylish. <col:Yellow>Kill 25 Enforcers</col> with a <col:Yellow>Snub Nose Revolver</col> for me as a field test.

    Kill <col: Yellow>25</col> Enforcers with a Snub Nose Revolver